


One True Love

by CryBabyPorcelain



Series: Missed Connections [1]
Category: Haikyuu!!
Genre: M/M, Pining, Unrequited Love, mentions of people being used, this hurts my heart
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-07-12
Updated: 2016-07-12
Packaged: 2018-07-23 12:39:42
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 747
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/7463637
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/CryBabyPorcelain/pseuds/CryBabyPorcelain
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>"What if the one true love's the only one that you get?"</p><p>Hinata reflects on what went wrong, and if there's a chance to change it.</p><p>Inspired by the song One Love by Marianas Trench.</p>
            </blockquote>





	One True Love

There was no reason for Hinata Shouyou to be up at this hour. He'd just gotten restless and needed to walk around a little. Expel some excess energy. There was nothing bothering him, nothing was wrong, he was fine. He insisted.

He never was a very good liar.

When his boyfriend glanced over at him from where he stood in the doorway between their living room and kitchen, asking him to come back to bed, Shouyou just smiled. He recycled the same old lies.

“I'm not tired”

“It's nothing.”

“I'll be there soon.”

He wondered if, maybe, his boyfriend was starting to suspect something. The way Shouyou didn't seem to want to sleep next to him, the way he hesitated before saying his name, the way he couldn't seem to look him in the eye. All indicative of a guilty conscience.

He was half right. Shouyou was guilty. Just, not of what he thought. Infidelity was not something his morals would ever allow. He just wished he could say the same for using people for some sort of emotional benefit.

Hinata Shouyou was in love. Just not with the man who he currently called his boyfriend.

He'd learn to love him, he thought when the other delivered his awkward, fumbling confession. After all, he had eyes that were just the right shade of blue.

After the other had shuffled off to bed, Shouyou was left with his thoughts.

Three years of high school that passed in a blur. Three years of denying his feelings, even to himself. Three years that he lost so fast.

Towards the end of his third year in high school, he came to a sudden realisation. He was definitely in love with Kageyama Tobio. And he'd missed his chance.

They'd both applied for university in Tokyo. Unfortunately, while Kageyama was accepted with a sports scholarship, Shouyou was left behind to fall back on his safety net school.

They kept in touch, for the first few months. But, as university began to take it's toll on them, they drifted apart. Every time Shouyou tried calling, it went straight to voice mail. When he sent texts, emails or Skype chats, they went unread for days. Eventually, he stopped trying.

Well, he tried to. Some nights, he catches himself with his phone in his hand, thumb hovering over Kageyama's name. He doesn't even know if he still has that same number. Some nights, he forgets everything that happened these past four years. He forgets that Tobio isn't just a phone call away. He can't reach him by riding his bike over the mountain anymore.

Something that has always been an issue for Shouyou is how easily he gets attached. And he definitely got attached to Kageyama. So attached. And now he spends his nights pining.

Sometimes, he hurts himself by wondering if Kageyama still thought about him. Did he still _feel_ Shouyou the way he felt him.

What if he woke up one night and found Tobio next to him? What if it didn't end at high school?

What if Shouyou's heart could heal?

Usually, he didn't dare hope. But sometimes, usually with the introduction of a little too much alcohol, the tiniest part of him that allows him to believe in infinite possibilities suggest that there is hope. After all, Tobio never flat out rejected him. It was possible, right?

He regrets those thoughts the next morning, as he lay in his boyfriend's embrace and struggled to come up with a believable reason for the tears streaming down his face.

And then, there was the guilt.

His boyfriend wasn't a bad person in any way, shape or form. Quite the opposite. He was understanding, soft spoken, patient, and honestly cared about people. But he wasn't Tobio.

Shouyou knew he loved him dearly, and would be crushed if he ever learned he was essentially a replacement for someone Shouyou hadn't had the guts to confess to.

With a sigh, Shouyou made his way out of the kitchen and retired to the bedroom. Pangs of guilt hit him in waves when he saw his boyfriend curled up on their bed, sleeping peacefully. If only he knew the reason Shouyou left their bed every night was to pine over another man in secret.

Shouyou sighed as he coiled himself around his sleeping boyfriend. Trying to will away the guilt as he settled into a light sleep.

Hinata Shouyou wasn't a cheat.

But he was as bad as one.

**Author's Note:**

> I've never written for Haikyuu before, and the first thing I write is this depressing mess. Hello, Haikyuu fandom. My name is Porcelain and I'm here to ruin your ships.  
> With the introductions out of the way, it is now 4:30am and I have not slept, I am rather ill and now I am also sad bc unrequited KageHina. Also this is way different to what I imagined it would be. I really painted my little sunshine baby as the bad guy here...  
> If any of you guys have ever read my DMMd fic, Eyes of Gold, you may have picked up on this sort of recurring theme of people using others or being used as romantic or sexual replacements. I just wanted to say that even I don't know where this has come from. It's not something that I have ever had any sort of experience with and it's not really something that I condone, but it's making an appearance in a few of my writings, even some of the unpublished stuff and originals that I've worked on. Strange.  
> As mentioned before, this fic is inspired by Marianas Trench's song [One Love, which you can listen to here](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=kPcDfLrzx3Y).  
> ~Porcelain xXx


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